My good friend, Jack Riepe, offered to swap a recipe. Guys were swapping recipes! What is this world coming to? Anyway, he wants an exotic French toast recipe, which I happen to have. When I was a kid, my dad spent some time in the service in Korea. He stopped in Japan on the way home, and one of the things he brought back was this recipe for Japanese-French Toast. This is a little fancier than your typical bachelor recipe, but it’s pretty easy.
First, in case you don’t know how to make the traditional French toast:
Take several slices of day-old bread. (This is the bachelor part. Old bread is better than fresh bread.) Crack a couple of eggs into a pie plate. Pour in a little milk, a spoonful of sugar, and scramble it up. The more milk, the farther it will go, the less milk, the richer the taste. If you want to experiment, throw in a capful of vanilla extract or scrape some nutmeg into it. Experiment, but don’t dilute the eggs too much. (I’m waiting for ahem someone to mix in a little rum, Jack.) Then you heat up a griddle, slash the bread in the mix, and cook it until it’s nice and brown. Use a fork to turn the toast over in the mix and on the griddle, and then you can eat the french toast with the fork. Saves having to wash a spatula. Another bachelor feature.
Here’s the Japanese part:
Before you make the french toast, get out the powdered sugar, a spoon, and an orange. Cut the orange into fourths. Make the french toast and put the finished toast on a plate. Don’t pour syrup on the toast! It is okay to butter it, though. Spoon some powdered sugar all over the toast. Be generous—that decorative sprinkle you get at a restaurant isn’t enough. Now squeeze juice from a piece of orange all over the powdered sugar. Get the sugar fairly wet. Eat. Wash the dishes when you’re done–don’t leave them in the sink for someone else to clean up. This recipe works well on kids.
Because this post is about two, um, “bachelor” recipes. Bachelor recipes have four features:
- Bachelor recipes are simple.
- Bachelor recipes are hard to mess up.
- Bachelor recipes can be eaten out of the cookware.
- Women find them vaguely offensive.
Recipe number one—(Ta-Da!) Tuna Soup. My daughters hate it. Well, they hate the idea of it.
- Take a can of tuna, any size, any kind, and dump it into a saucepan, juice and all.
- Dump in a can of vegetables, liquid and all. Frozen veggies are okay, just cook it longer.
- Add water until it looks like soup.
- If you want, add salt, pepper, Tabasco, Worcestershire, or whatever.
- Heat it up until it’s hot enough.
- Eat. Put a hot pad under the pot if you sit at the table to eat.
And that leads us to the other recipe. Generic Soup in ten easy steps. Follow these rules, and you can always make soup.
- Meat. This includes bones and skin. Any meat, any state of doneness. Let me know how it works out if you put in fish together with some other meat. If you have actual flesh not attached to bones, cut it up into smallish pieces first; that’ll save work in step 5.
- Put the animal tissue into a pot, cover with water. Anytime during this recipe, you can add more water if it gets low.
- Boil it slowly for a long time, couple hours or the length of a football game.
- Cool it down until you can touch the liquid without experiencing pain.
- Get rid of the bones and skin. Leave in all the meat. The easiest way is to pour the liquid into a bowl. You’re a guy; figure it out.
- Heat it back up, and throw in vegetables. You can use leftovers in the fridge, for instance. Make sure it’s in pieces that fit on a spoon. (Do not throw in whole stalks of celery, for instance.) Put in enough veggies, so it looks like soup.
- Toss in some flavorings. Beware the brown powders unless you know what you’re doing. Otherwise, put in things you like. Don’t overdo it—put in some, stir, then taste. This looks very professional if anybody is looking.
- Boil it slowly another hour or so. The idea is for the vegetables to get cooked.
- About 15 minutes before you want to eat, stir in some noodles. You need the 15 minutes to cook the noodles.
So—do you have any good bachelor recipes? Click the comment link under the title.